You’ve spent the last twenty or twenty-five years searching for that, one. The one true love that you adore. Let’s just say somehow, someway, God spoke to you and said, “My child, love is on the way are you ready?” Then you quickly answer yes, without thinking twice. Suddenly, in less than a lifetime, love shows up in a different flavor. Do you accept?
It’s a question that many of us purposely avoid, but would you?
If you knew love came in a chocolate sunset, vanilla mochilla, strawberry daiquiri or some other wonderful flavor to create the ultimate passion just for you is that something that you could accept?
What about the world we live in? We don’t necessarily get an option to choose the color of our employer, the tan of our realtor or personality of our customers. Instead we just put our best foot forward and make the best of the situation. There’s no guarantee that it’ll ever work, but if the feeling and the heart is in it, it makes it difficult to turn down, right or wrong?
One of the biggest reasons foreign dating is the most avoided topic is for the fear of being scorned for sharing interest ONLY in your very own. Without a doubt, a preference is a preference; there’s no dispute amongst that. The problem lies in knowing that love is at your doorstep, but you won’t open the door because it’s a White girl, a Black woman, a Latin woman, an Asian woman, an Indian girl or a Russian woman. Feelings are what they are, and when you avoid them for such reasons therein lies the problem.
When personalities differ, when certain characteristics are abandoned or thrown out of a window, there’s a state of panic! Many of us panic when we first meet a person and they aren’t who we think they are, or they are better than what we anticipated. Then for some unknown reason, in some cases we push them aside without ‘wholeness’ in our explanation. Unfortunately, that’s normal; sometimes we panic at work just because the boss wants to see us. But we don’t run off and quit our jobs before we find out the real deal.
Differences do kill. Differences and misunderstandings are the #1 killer in many relationships these days. On some of our favorite television shows, they create inside jokes concerning the subject. Our friends at home even clown us when we make mention to the idea of doing so.
The idea is to realize that intimacy and love isn’t necessarily a choice. It can strike with such deadly force that it can paralyze your thoughts; burn your heart in passion or disarm you from whatever dealings you are associated with. If you are really attracted to someone, the feeling will not discriminate. Of course that doesn’t mean you should dump your current love for a crush – no. But a feeling is a feeling, that’s the point.
Nevertheless, we are all entitled to our own preference.
Just make sure it’s the one you do want.